Happy May, i.e. Eurovision month everybody!
Well, it's been quite some time since this blog was last updated – a whopping 6,5 years, to be exact! However, with the ongoing COVID pandemic affecting our lives globally and putting our lives on hold (and worse of course, at risk), and the Eurovision Song Contest finally coming back after last year's cancellation, this felt as good a time as any to give this whole blogging thing a go, even if briefly.
Let's take a look at this year's Eurovision entries then, shall we?
So here's how it's going to work: I have not listened to this year's entries yet, so these reviews will be based on first impressions, after which the songs will be rated on a five-star scale. I have a confession to make: I just kind of... skipped last year altogether, so any possible returning contestants are new faces and voices to me. The reviews are listed according to the running order of the semi-final and they will be based on either official preview videos available on the ESC channel or music videos released by the acts themselves. Got it? Great, let's go!
The Roop - Discoteque (Lithuania)
Okay, so we're off to a good start here! The song catches your attention from the very moment the beat comes in. There is this dark, almost hypnotic vibe to it. The verses are giving me some FutureSex/LoveSounds-era Justin Timberlake vibes and I'm quite feeling it. In comparison, the an. noy. ing. ly. chop. py. cho. rus itself lacks oomph, but the post-chorus picks up the pace again. Interestingly, the bridge has no vocals on it. I wonder how well that will translate live?
This is one incredibly catchy tune that I'd love to see qualify for the final. I can't help loving the throwback to that mid-2000s kind of sound and I think it's safe to say that this will be a hit in Eurovision clubs across the continent, virtual and non-virtual alike.
The cringy music video, on the other hand, reeeeally doesn't do it for me, so I hope they will be able to create a live performance that does justice to the song. I have a hard time seeing the dorky moves and the silly faces, intentional or not, working well on the Eurovision stage.
Also, I'm not entirely convinced that you can use "discoteque" as a verb. Or even "discotheque", which, you know, would be the correct spelling.
★★★★
Ana Soklič - Amen (Slovenia)
You know that feeling when sometimes you see a singer and then they start singing and it takes a moment for your brain to connect the face and the voice, almost as if you were eating ice cream that tasted like bananas but was pink in colour? I'm sort of getting that from this singer. I don't think it helps that the official music video is basically just the studio version laid over an ever so slightly off-sync live performance.
The song itself is a decent, if expected power ballad. It's not bad by any means; the singer has a cool, unique voice and you can never go wrong with a little bit of gospel backing vocals. I'm sure the bridge-into-the-final-chorus moment will be lovely live. But I also think its genericness will stop it from placing very high in the final (should it qualify). Even after a couple of replays, I struggle to remember what happens in the song and I don't think my limited attention span is fully to blame. Unfortunate.
★★1/2
Manizha - Russian Woman (Russia)
Uh... this one on the other hand is anything but predictable or expected! Musically, it's a mess: it sounds like a mash-up of two completely different songs, and it's mostly sung in Russian but then there's some English lines randomly thrown in for good measure, yet there she addresses Russian women. I don't know if the song is sort of instantly catchy, or meme-worthy, or just bonkers enough to properly transcend language barriers and really thrive. I mean sure, it's Russia, so it will likely be top 10 or so no matter what, but still.
Thematically it seems to be about female empowerment which is all very neat. Even after a couple of replays, I'm left confused but then again, I'd rather be confused than bored. Although... I do feel this might be a bit of a grower though – I've added a whole star into the rating since starting writing. The singer also has a fun, captivating stage presence to her. (And this will probably end up on my ESC playlist by the time the semi-finals begin.)
★★★
Tusse - Voices (Sweden)
If you're looking for well-produced and polished pop, Sweden never disappoints. Do they often reinvent the wheel? Perhaps not.
And even then, I find myself underwhelmed by the latest Swedish entry. Lyrically, the song paints a platitude-ridden story of self-empowerment without ever really saying anything. Okay, this is the Eurovision Song Contest so expecting life-altering poetry will only set you up for a disappointment but it's all still almost offensively bland. Also, can we please just agree that singing about "the haters" is never not embarrassing?
The repetitive structure of the song is not helped by not only the post-choruses but also the bridge being literally the same lines just repeated over and over. Even the key change before the final chorus feels formulaic and manages to add absolutely nothing.
The singer has a nice voice (even if the studio version hides it with obscene amounts of auto-tune) but the song is ultimately a letdown. "You know we've got a million choices", he sings, but sending this song was a choice. Dear Sweden, you can do better than that.
★★1/2
Montaigne - Technicolour (Australia)
Oh look, we're Australia, we're doing mass events! Europe, what's good?
Uh... anyway. Australia is represented by Montaigne, undoubtedly one of the more unique voices around this year. She has an interesting 90s alt-rock frontwoman (Sinéad O’Connor, Dolores O'Riordan of the Cranberries) meets late noughties quirky pop girl (Florence Welch, early Marina and the Diamonds) sound to her which makes for an interesting listen. That said, the transition from the verses into the chorus is pretty jarring - it's almost as if the final product was clumsily stitched together from two different songs.
Regardless, I have a strong hunch that this song will really stand out on the Eurovision stage. It does not sound like an easy tune to sing so let's hope that she nails it. There's no doubt Australia is gearing up for another year of doing excellently, should the live performance go well. (Speaking of which, I wonder if they are going to have to rely on the live-on-tape version?)
★★★★
Vasil - Here I Stand (North Macedonia)
Okay, that video intro was unnecessary.
It's almost an unwritten rule at this point that every year, there are certain genre boxes that will be ticked. You've got your power ballads, your generic yet well-done pop songs, your tongue-in-cheek meme songs... the list goes on. For your Disney soundtrack-esque musical theatre fix of the year, look no further - here's Vasil with "Here I Stand".
Now... I'm not overly keen on musical theatre. If you are, you just might like this one. I can't say I do. The guy can sing for sure. But even as I'm listening to the song, I actively forget what I just heard. When I close my eyes, I see the end credits of what must've been a cheesefest of a movie rolling in front of me; and when the song ended, I had no memory of any melody, of any lyrics, of anything other than a man with a permanent smile etched on his face.
Is it awful? No, I don't think so. I zoned out too much to know for certain but it probably wasn't bad. But I also wouldn't recommend you to start booking flight tickets to Skopje for next year.
★★
Lesley Roy - Maps (Ireland)
She's running and running and running, all alone in the middle of nowhere with only one way to go, and then ends up on a deserted beach. Maybe she could've done with an actual map and compass. Should we be worried?
Ireland has a habit of sending feel-good entries and they are sticking to that pattern this year as well. "Maps" is an energetic, uplifting song that will likely get decent points across the board. It doesn't strike me as a potential winner but it is a perfectly nice, inoffensive tune that could deservingly qualify for the final but then get lost somewhere on the right side of the scoreboard. No pun intended.
★★★
Elena Tsagrinou - El Diablo (Cyprus)
Another Cypriot entry with a Spanish name? Are they trying to Yeah Yeah Fire their way into the top again? Let's see.
Now, what do mamacitas and tacos and tamales have to do with Cyprus? Your guess is as good as mine. The song relies heavily on an easily memorable chorus that's familiar in a way that makes you go "hey I know this one!" before you realise that this is literally your first time hearing the song. What I'm trying to say here is that it's a chorus you've already heard a thousand times, with some extra bits attached to it to make it a 'new' song.
Creatively, it's a non-sensical, regurgitated dance-pop pastiche that doesn't add anything new into the mix. Nonetheless, it could spark a flame among the same crowd that loved the likes of "Fuego". To each their own.
★★
TIX - Fallen Angel (Norway)
Here we have TIX representing Norway and singing about a fallen angel. I'm not sure about the sin he committed, but I'm suspecting it's having more than six people on stage.
I don't know what to make of this one. Visually, it looks like he's about to burst into a tacky party rap song about getting high in a jacuzzi or something, but then the actual message is about battling depression and feelings of inferiority.
The staging is very much on the nose and ventures too far into camp territory, to the point where it takes away from the sincerity of the performance and makes you wonder if this is supposed to be a joke or not. (I'm assuming the latter.) Admittedly, I'm not familiar with TIX's stage persona but the whole white boy wannabe pimp aesthetic is a bit much. A reimagined staging wouldn't hurt.
★★1/2
Albina - Tick-Tock (Croatia)
Croatia is not playing around this time! "Tick-Tock" is a dance floor filler that mixes modern sounds with retro influences, with an infectious deep-house-meets-disco chorus. While the disco influence is more subtle, this is actually very much "of the moment", considering the recent disco revival with everyone in the 'real' pop music world from Róisín Murphy and Jessie Ware to Kylie and Dua Lipa drawing inspiration from the disco movement.
After having the song on repeat for quite some time now, I'm really looking forward to seeing the live performance of this song and with a good staging, I wouldn't be surprised to see it go far. Croatia is not one of those success-by-default Eurovision countries, but this entry should easily stand out enough to gain votes across the board. A qualifier? For sure. Left side of the scoreboard? Absolutely. Top 10? Fingers crossed!
★★★★
Hooverphonic - The Wrong Place (Belgium)
It's always exciting when there are more established artists and groups among the Eurovision contestants; those who have a refined point of view, musically speaking. As a group that was originally found in 1995, Hooverphonic is an example of this, and "The Wrong Place" has an air of sophistication and authenticity that you might not find in songs that were clearly workshopped with the ESC in mind.
Starting off with a verse that sounds like a non-lethargic Lana Del Rey, by the first chorus the song has grown into a moody late-1990s alt-pop/rock gem that never was, one that wouldn't have sounded out of place on a contemporary radio playlist sandwiched between the likes of The Cardigans and Garbage. Lyrically the song tells the story of a regretful one-night stand, which on the music video culminates in a gothic murder scene. Grim.
Whenever Belgium has qualified for the final during the past decade or so, they've done really well, and I would be extremely surprised (and disappointed) to see this song not place in the top 10 at the very least. "The Wrong Place" is a brilliant tune, a testament to which is the fact that I found myself replaying it countless times already, constantly surprised by how quickly it was over already. This is some excellent quality here – well done, Belgium!
★★★★★
Eden Alene - Set Me Free (Israel)
This year, Israel has chosen to send "Set Me Free", a glitzy dance pop tune that will undoubtedly inspire endless Ariana Grande comparisons (I mean, the whistle tones are right there). The song itself benefits greatly from the glossy production that makes it sounds polished, even if it's all extremely familiar. You just know you've heard a bunch of variations of this same exact chorus in your local H&M fitting room during the past couple of years.
While the song's lack of substance outside of the top-notch production makes it a tad disposable for my liking, it certainly bops, and its catchy beat will surely make it a hit among the Eurovision crowd, gaining a lovely share of votes.
★★★1/2
Roxen - Amnesia (Romania)
"Amnesia" is a modern-sounding slice of gloomy pop that features some wonderfully creative melodic writing, especially in the chorus. I will say that this is not the type of entry I'd expect from Romania, but it's an extremely pleasant surprise. Roxen's vocals are somewhat heavily processed in this album version (a stylistic choice) so it'll be interesting to hear how well the song translates in a live setting.
It's always refreshing to have songs that do not try to conform to the ridiculously narrow ideas of what an Eurovision song should be like; you really should just focus on making good and well-crafted music instead. And there definitely is an audience for 'darker' songs like this one, so I'm sure it will qualify and do quite well in the grand final as well. And rightfully so.
★★★1/2
Efendi - Mata Hari (Azerbaijan)
You know how every year, there tends to be at least that one entry with sort of Middle Eastern instrumentation and a chorus with no more than a couple of words? Yup, "Mata Hari" is that one. Exotic sounds? Strong accents? Lyrics that make little if any sense? Check, check, check.
Am I being ignorant and/or insensitive here? Yeah, probably. But this feels like an iteration of that same generic track you've already heard so many times before from one of the South Eastern Eurovision countries.
Until you get to the final chorus, that is, when the song suddenly amps up the electronica and the guitars, immediately exciting you with its unpredictable twist... only to end just as abruptly in 18 seconds after that. Ugh, such a tease!
Now that I'm replaying the video, I can't help wishing that the other choruses had some of that same explosiveness, or that the overall track would've incorporated contemporary sounds more seamlessly with the traditional elements.
★★
Go_A - SHUM (Ukraine)
...what on Earth did I just watch? You know what, this is some experimental stuff and I can respect that. I'm very much not bored, and all the more confused.
I'm not sure what kind of an occasion this song would ever be played in, apart from the Eurovision stage (which is a given). Perhaps a mushroom-induced frenzy of people throwing their bodies around on the dimly lit dance floor of an Eastern European underground club? (Or an impromptu campfire rave, apparently.)
Even if I can't really wrap my head around this entry, I bet it hits decently hard in the Eastern voting bloc, and it probably has some meme appeal in the west as well. I will say that there is a cool fusion of urban and folky elements here.
★★★
Destiny - Je Me Casse (Malta)
Finally, we have Malta, coming at you with all the lyrical finesse of rhyming 'honey' with 'money', and 'baby' with 'maybe'. I'm almost disappointed she didn't manage to squeeze in 'fire'/'desire' to really complete the obvious rhyming trifecta.
All snark aside, "Je Me Casse" more than makes up for its occasionally unimaginative lyrics with its super fun instrumental, built around electro-swing-inspired hooks. There's rarely a Eurovision year without at least one Designated Attitude Anthem For The Ladies, and I mean, if that's what you're gunning for, you might as well make it catchy? That this song does.
With enough costume and wig changes to make your average drag queen jealous, the music video seems to be promising us an entertaining show - and I hope Destiny delivers.
★★★1/2
So, who is going to qualify?
There are a couple of virtually permanent finalists among this lineup, namely Azerbaijan, Sweden, Russia, and Ukraine – and then there's Australia, of course, who's qualified every time they've participated since 2015. Apart from Azerbaijan, I can see them all qualifying this year as well.
This would leave us with six available slots. Now, I don't have the brainpower to start predicting and calculating voting patterns, but here's what I'm expecting:
- Croatia and Lithuania compete in the same genre. Both are super catchy, but Lithuania's live performance will be too cringy for the general public. Out of the two, Croatia qualifies.
- Slovenia is the only proper power ballad in this semi and while it has a niche there, the song itself is too forgettable.
- North Macedonia will not stand out.
- Romania, on the other hand, is memorable enough to qualify easily.
- Ireland is cute and happy, but will probably get lost in the lineup.
- Cyprus and Israel are both easily digestible dance-pop tunes with enough sonic familiarity to work for the viewers. Both will likely qualify, although Cyprus is clearly the weaker one out of the two and might be in danger.
- Although Azerbaijan typically does well, their latest entry might be just too generic. If they were to qualify, though, I suspect they'd maybe snatch Cyprus's spot?
- Norway's entry is rather... meh, and the staging is a tad on the gimmicky side. Unless Europe is suffering from Swedish fatigue, TIX's flight will be cut short. Having said that, I wouldn't be entirely surprised if neither of the Scandinavian entries of this semi qualified.
- The only wrong place for Belgium is outside of the grand final. An absolute qualifier.
- Malta has a genuinely fun tune, as well as the closing slot, so they are destined to sail right through.
Naturally, live performances can make the world of difference.
Do we have the winner in this lineup?
So far, I've only gone through this first semi-final, I haven't really been following the discussion around this year's entries, and I also haven't taken a look at any betting odds or anything. In other words, I have no idea which songs are being hyped up by the fan community. (It's quite refreshing to go in blind for once, though.)
So far, I don't think there is an obvious winner among what I've seen and heard so far. However, if I were to hazard a guess, I really could see Belgium taking it this year. I have a feeling they might turn out to be quite the jury favourite, too.
Those were my thoughts, feel free to share yours – and do stay tuned for a review of the second semi-final.
Stay safe!
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